I have this pair of jeans I recently patched up that I’ve had for a long time. It’s not that I couldn’t go out and get a new pair, but old stuff has a story. This pair of Levi’s has been with (on?) me through a lot, including an up and down 2017.
It was a year of fun and firsts as well as trials and tribulations. A year of moving forward and remembering there’s still a lot I need to change about myself. I spent a lot of time reflecting after big moments and hard times, of which there were many. I tried my best to be present when I recognized there was something to remember. Despite that frame of mind, sometimes I wasn’t present enough to realize I needed to slow down and not let my emotions get the best of me, an unfortunate occurrence in my life.
If I have one goal in 2018, it’s to do more than patch up the holes in my life. I want to spend time to fix things in all aspects of my life. I recognize this will take time, and I don’t have any illusions that I will sit down on Christmas Eve next year and just be a better person. There are mistakes I know I can’t un-do and apologies I can’t give. But, what I can do is start to forgive myself and be self-aware enough not to continue to make the same mistakes.
Maybe, in these faded, patched up Levi’s, I can grow into a better version of me.